For weeks I’ve been convincing myself that it must be some kind of joke; a cruel hoax perpetrated by arch-populist Simon Cowell in vengeance against those he probably considers to be music snobs. I was certain that there was surely no way the limited range of the X Factor winners would take on the beautiful complexity of a song like Leonard Cohen’s ‘Hallelujah’.
Despite my many cultural objections to Cowell and his ilk, his commercial nous has never been in doubt. He has successfully manipulated the medium of television to bolster his own wealth and status. Which of us – given the same opportunity – would not have done the same?
None of the ideas were particularly new – the variety/talent show is as old as TV itself, and Cowell would’ve been more than aware of the selling power of the medium and its capability to transform mediocrity into chart success. Famously Cowell had once researched which songs were most popular in pub karaoke sessions and had his artists (or micro-tv-celebs) record them for guaranteed chart cracking capability.
Where Cowell has excelled with X Factor is his ‘control’ of the package, his production company help to create the show and his record label gets to release music by the winner(s). The contracts that all contestants have to sign are also famously restrictive, meaning that none of them are able to capitalise on the fame they’ve been given – without Cowell’s approval and share. If they’re any good then long-term earnings will follow, but at the very least he’ll have a couple of big hit singles.
The X Factor single is now generally accepted as a guaranteed Christmas Number One simply due to the vast quantity of television time (and consequently ‘celebrity’ mag/paper coverage) dedicated to the programme and its participants. That this is a ‘given’ normally persuades Cowell to find an original song, from which he can derive some other associated benefit be it publishing royalties or other favours.
All of this evidence would suggest that a song such as ‘Hallelujah’ would be completely off his radar, it ticks none of the boxes. It’s not that X Factor contestants haven’t previously desecrated great songs, they’ve just normally steered clear of the credible in favour of the blatantly obvious.
Cover versions are a massively subjective territory, indeed it could be viably argued that either John Cale or Jeff Buckley’s version of ‘Hallelujah’ are the definitive by which all others should be measured. Consequently my wrath is wasted on artists who misuse their talent recording hopeless versions of songs which I consider untouchable. This is not limited to wannabes; witness the peerless David Bowie’s tragic version of The Beach Boys’ ‘God Only Knows’ if proof is needed. You won’t need to hear much of it before tears of laughter, disbelief and anger spill from your eyes.
My interest in X Factor begins and ends within the first few weeks, once the voyeur value of the idiot auditions is over. I’m slightly offended that I’m forced to start thinking about it again now; could they not have chosen another song? Most versions of Hallelujah run over six minutes, the lyrics need space to be heard and absorbed. It famously took Cohen over a year to write it. How long will the X Factor pop-radio-friendly version be?
At Absolute we’ve started to play the Jeff Buckley version in all its glory, it seems like the right thing to do. Buckley’s life-story gives an added poignancy to the song, his prowess and his legacy, his semi-achieved legend, his unfulfilled destiny. As Christian said this morning (and I’m paraphrasing here) – ‘you need to have had a life to sing this song’. Absolute is playing it because you might not have heard it. I doubt that the X Factor finalists would even been aware of the song until they were forced to sing it – is that really what you want to hear?
I try hard not to be elitist about music, though it clearly runs through my veins and inhabits my mind like a potent virus. Similarly it’s too easy for those who know nothing about music to call the rest of us snobs. This is the beauty of the ‘real music’ proposition at Absolute Radio – they can champion music and enable you to hear the definitive version of songs – it might not be a level playing field but by playing Buckley’s Hallelujah it does help to redress the balance.
